In Love and War containts Adult material, including Shonen Ai/Yaoi... If

you don't want to read this then don't.


A Fushigi Yuugi Sekkushiaru Roman

by Sailor Mac and Sailor Star Love



Modern Tokyo, Miaka's bedroom


      Morning. . .the sunlight hits my eyes, waking me up. . . For a

second, I'm disoriented. This isn't my room! I'm not in the palace


      Where am I? Then, reality sets in. I'm back *home*. . . back

in modern Tokyo. I'm not in the Universe of the Four Gods anymore.

      And in the next bedroom over is the man I love. Tamahome came

back home with me.

      I still can't believe it happened. One second, we were on the

battlefield, and Yui was pronouncing her second wish. . . the wish

that she and I would both go back to Tokyo for good. . .and then

Tamahome style="mso-spacerun: yes">  screaming my name, grabbing at me. . .

      And then, both of us coming to on the floor of my schoolroom.

      What's going on back in Konan? Are they still fighting? Is it

over already? Are all my friends okay? Hotohori, Tasuki, Chichiri,

Mitsukake. . . Where's The Book? If I could find it, open it, read

it, I would know what was happening to them. I'm sorry, everyone,

sorry I can't be with you now.

      I lie back down and think again of Tamahome being *here*, in

my own world with me. I've thought about that kind of thing so

much. . . I can't believe it's really happening! It's a miracle,

that's what it is. . .nothing short of a miracle. He's said he would

defy the gods to be with me, and I guess that's exactly what he did!

      I'm so tempted to go into the room next door and wake him

up. . .but no, he needs his rest. I'll let him sleep awhile longer.

      And meanwhile, I can indulge in all the fantasies I've always

had of us being in my world together, fantasies I can now actually

live out -- taking him to all my favorite places, introducing him to

my friends, curling up in front of the TV with him to watch romantic

movies. . .

      And then. . .there's my *special* fantasy.

      It's the fantasy I've had almost as long as I've been in Konan, almost as

long as I've known him. . .

      Exotic? You could say that. Exotic for the Universe of the Four

Gods, anyway. It involves something they definitely do not have

there. . .

      A shower.

      It starts out with me in my bathroom at home, but nobody's home

but me. . .and I'm getting ready for my shower. I turn on the water,

step in and let it run over my body. . .it feels so good, so

warm. . .I raise my arms so that it can run over my breasts, right

over my nipples. . .

      And then, I hear the noise outside. I'm frightened for a

second. . .has someone broken into the house? Are we being robbed?

Am I in danger of being. . .

      There is a shadow on the curtain, the sound of clothes being

dropped to the floor. . .then a familiar voice saying, "I thought

you'd like company."

      Relief and happiness flood through me. "Tamahome!"

      He pushes the curtain aside and climbs in. . .look at him, he's

just so gorgeous, so perfect. . . such a beautiful body, he looks

like he should be modeling underwear on bilboards, not fighting

evil. . .

      I throw my arms around him and crush my body against his,

rubbing up against him, bringing my lips to his for a hot kiss. My

tongue pushes into his mouth, and I feel his caressing it, tickling

it, tangling with it. . .I slowly slide my hands down his back. . .

savoring every inch of him, every bit of smooth skin,

tight muscle. . .

      When I reach his bottom, I take it in both hands and squeeze it

tightly. Oh, I *love* how it feels, so firm, so shapely. . .I begin

to knead it slowly, and he leans his head back and gives a moan.

style="mso-spacerun: yes"> "Bad girl," he says in a teasing tone. "You're not supposed to do

that to a man without warning him first."

      "Hmm. . . how can I make it up to you?"

      "Why don't you wash me?"

      "It will be a pleasure."

      I reach for a bottle of shower gel on the side of the tub and

squeeze it on my hands. I bring my mouth to his again, for a few

quick kisses, letting my tongue just barely dart into his lips, just

enough to tease him. . .

      Then, I smooth my hands down his neck and over his shoulders,

then down his arms. He makes an "mmm" sound as I move down to his

hands, gently caressing the backs, then moving down to his

fingers. . . He raises his arms, inviting me to soap along his

body. . .I get another handful of gel and run my hands quickly along

his chest (I plan on coming back there later!) and then down his

washboard stomach. . .

      "Aahh," he says. "I've never enjoyed a bath so much. . ."

      "There's more to come," I say, getting another handful of gel.

"Turn around. . ."

      "You haven't finished my front yet."

      "I'll get to it. . .eventually. You'll see."

      "Hope that's a promise," he says, turning his back to me.

      I start to run my hands over his back. . . then get a better

idea. I begin rubbing gel on my own breasts, and then stand right

behind him, pressing my breasts into his back. . .I start to move,

up and down, and the friction of his skin on my nipples is so, so

luscious. . .

      He lets out a low moan. "Now *that's* what I call a style="mso-spacerun: yes"> 


      "And I'm going to be sure you're *thoroughly* washed," I

whisper, rubbing harder, faster, moving my body up and down, around

and around. . .Tamahome starts moving with me, whispering my name,

reaching behind him to tangle his fingers in my hair. . . I lean over

and kiss his neck, nipping at it, swirling my tongue on it, as I

continue my unique way of washing.

      I begin to slide down his body, until I'm kneeling behind him,

and I take more handfuls of gel and begin soaping his legs. I can

feel him trembling in anticipation. . . he knows I'm going to do

something after that, something good, but he doesn't know if it will

involve his manhood or his bottom. . .

      It's the latter. When I reach that part of him, I wash it with

slow, wide circles, feeling it thoroughly, running my thumbs up and

down it. . .I pull away just long enough to let the shower spray

rinse him off. . .

      And then, I begin to kiss the left buttock, stopping every once

and again to nip at it. He moans, very loudly. . . I can tell he

*really* likes this. I move my head to the other side, and begin to

nip at that as well. . .

      "Miaka. . . ohh, I can't stand it. . .too good. . . too

good. . ."

      I stand up again, pressing my breasts against his back and

letting my hands wander to his chest. . . see, I said I was coming

back there! And I find his nipples, and grasp them lightly between my

thumb and forefinger, squeezing them just hand enough to make him

moan again. I brush my fingers over them, again and again. . .

      "There's still a part of you left to wash," I say. And I lather

my hands once again, and motion for him to turn around. . . I kneel

in front of him, and grasp his manhood with my right hand, the sac

beneath with his left. I move one hand, then the other, in a firm,

slow caress. . .

      "Yes," he moans. "Keep washing me. . .like that, ohh, like

that. . .Miaka. . ."

      I stroke faster with both hands, and he's starting to thrust

his hips, the low noises he's making indicating he's getting close to

orgasm. . .

      But he gently pushes me away. "No. . . not yet. Not when it's

your turn."

      And then, he takes the same tube, and I shudder with

anticipation. . .

      He squeezes some on his hands. . . and says "Close your

eyes. . ."

      I feel his fingertips caressing mine, gently, so gently. . .

then moving up the back of my hands, up my arms. . . to my

shoulders. . .yes, lower, lower, please. . .

      Damn, he's going up to my neck instead! And then down to my

back. . .which he's just soaping with his hands, no fancy tricks like

I used. . .ahh, but there's something else he could do for me when

his hands get low enough. . .yes, they're almost to my buttocks, yes,

yes. . .

      AAIIEE! He's flaring out toward my hips instead. . . style="mso-spacerun: yes">  and back

down to my legs. . . His hands are on my feet now, then my ankles,

slowly working their way upward. . . *too* slowly. . . he's up to my

knees now. . .and then. . .ohh. . .my thighs. . .yes, yes, ohh, I can

feel the pleasure as he gets closer. . .closer. . .please, Tamahome,

move up, put your fingers in there, *please*. . .

      Ohh, he's inching backwards instead. . . but now he's cupping

my bottom, and it's nice, so nice. . .and he's squeezing it like I

did to him, and I feel so hot all over. . . (I've had other fantasies

about Tamahome putting his manhood up there. style="mso-spacerun: yes">  . . in my bottom, that

is. Is that normal? Do other women think about that? I wish I had

someone I could ask. . .)

      He stands up, and gently has me lean back against him. . . and

he puts more soap on his hands. . .

      And then, I feel him grasping both breasts, squeezing them,

caressing them. . . I let out a very loud moan, especially when he

begins to rub his thumbs over the nipples.

      "Is that good?" he whispers. "Do you like that? You look so

beautiful like that, honey, with your face all flushed in

passion. . . you're starting to feel really hot, aren't you? Your

heart's pounding. . .you want me to make you come, I know you

do. . . just relax, sweetheart. . .I'm going to make you come so

hard. . ."

      He keeps one hand on my breasts. . . and then other reaches

down between my legs. . . first stroking the hair, lathering it. . .

and then. . .ohhh. . .yes, touch me like that, like that. . .no,

don't tease me! Don't just stick it in a tiny bit and pull it out!

Put it in me, put it in me, ohh, I *need* it, I feel so empty

inside. . . Oooh! Yes! There, there, that's my sweet spot, rub right

*there*, style="mso-spacerun: yes">  ohh, yes, I feel so hot all over.. . .ohh, the

feelings. . .I'm tingling right down to my toenails, I know any

second I'm going to come and come big. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">       He takes his hand away. . . but bends me over further, and positions

himself behind me. . . because this is a fantasy, we're not bound by

the rules governing mikos. We can take our love to the limit, become

truly *one*. . .

      I feel him grasp my hips. . . and then thrust into my womanhood,

deep and hard. I almost shriek. He leans over and kisses my neck, his

hands moving up to my breasts. . .

      "My darling," he whispers. "I love you so much. . ."

      "I love you, too."

      He starts to move, picking up speed more and more and more. . .

his fingers play with my nipples, flicking lightly over them, then a

gentle squeeze, then rubbing his palms back and forth over the

surface. . .

      "Tamahome," I moan. "Ohhh, Tamahome. . ."

      "Miaka. . ." He thrusts faster, and his caresses increase, and

my head falls forward as I moan deeper and louder. . . oh, Gods, I'm

going to explode, I know I am, and I don't care, I could shatter into

a billion atoms right now and it would be glorious. style="mso-spacerun: yes">  . . more, more,

my love. . . ohh, I'm almost there, almost there. . .

      And then, I feel it. . . the pleasure screams through every

inch of me, and I can only scream back, jerking my hips against him

again and again as one hot spasm after another wracks me. . . and I

hear him cry my name out, and I feel the hot rush of his seed filling

me. . .

      We both collapse to the shower floor, exhausted and panting. I

turn so I can throw my arms around him and bury my head in his


      "You never cease to amaze me," he says.

      "Same here. . .I don't know what I'd ever do without you.

You're everything to me. ."

      "You're everything to me as well. I love you. . ."

      "I love you, too."

      And we kiss again, and cuddle, and think to ourselves that we

want to stay together forever. . .

# # #

      I snap back to reality.

      I'm lying on my stomach with one hand in my pajama bottoms and

the other in my top. . . as I always am when I have this fantasy.

      I roll onto my back and pull my hands out, straighten my

clothing. Did he hear me cry his name out when I climaxed? (It's

never, never as good as when he does the same thing to me. . .)

      I may not be having this fantasy anymore. . . if it becomes a


      Well, it *could* happen. We could find a moment when we're home

alone together, and then we could slip into the shower. . .

      Gods, I shouldn't be thinking this way at a time like this. Not

when our friends could be in danger.

      And the horrible thought keeps coming into my head that we may

never see the Universe of the Four Gods again, that we may be cut off

from them for the rest of our lives. I firmly push it away. I do

*not* want to think about that.

      But. . . we're together, he and I. We've defied fate and the

odds. We're both living in the same world, my world. . . the world I

want to show him.

      I get out of bed and head for the bathroom, to get ready for

the day. I'll make him breakfast, and then we'll take him into the

city on the train. I can't wait to see his reactions when he sees

everything. . .


Meanwhile back in Konan, in Tasuki's room:


      I cry...

      Gods, I can't stop crying at night.

      First Nuriko, then Chiriko... And now, so many deaths around

me, soldiers, men, women and childs decimated. And for what?



      I shiver, roll into a ball and gather the blankets about me.

But they offer me but a false warmth. My heart and soul needs warmth

but none can give it to me.


      Chichiri could do all this, with but a tender gesture, but a

kiss. But we haven't spoken of our feelings since the few days before

we left for Hokkan. And now things have gone so fast, we hadn't had

time to talk.

      I wipe a few tears, when Seiryuu was called forth and we lost

our seishi powers, I thought... I thought Chichiri would come to me

finally and that we could drown our sadness in our mutual love.

      But Chichiri hadn't... He stays away from me and my love...

      "GODS!!! Chichiri... What if I lose you also?... I couldn't

bear it!..." I sob, I no longer am afraid for me, I am afraid for

him. I cry so hard, that I attract unwanted attention.

      Kouji comes in my room, no pishposh knocking among ourselves,

we've known each other too long for that.

      "Gen-chan... Gen-chan... Are you okay?..." I feel him sitting

on my bed, if only this was Chichiri and not Kouji. Don't get me

wrong, I love Kouji, more like the brother I never had. Sure when we

were younger, we had a few tumbles, due to too much alcohol intake

but nothing serious, not really a relationship other than a deep

friendship. I love Kouji, but, it's so different from what I feel for

Chichiri. The love I feel for Chichiri is as intense as the heat of

the magical fire I wield, magical... yes... that's the perfect


      "Genrou... What's wrong?.. Come on, ya can tell yer old pal,

Kouji!... Kouji is here to listen to yer problem, yep he is.. See?

Kouji's there!"

      I can't help but chuckle when Kouji pull the old talk to

himself routine. I sigh, my laughter is short lived.

      "Ye're thinking about that monk, don't you?"

      I nod, I already told Kouji of my feelings for Chichiri. I

didn't need to tell him, when I rescued Chichiri from those Kouto

guards that were attacking defenseless children. Kouji saw my

reactions, when Chichiri walked away he said: "Man... I don't know

what you see in that guy..."

      "Damn it, Genrou... He's a monk! So okay, his sect doesn't

frown on the wedding of their monks but really... You and a monk?..."

      "You haven't seen what I went through with him!" I snap at him.

      He sobers up. "Gomen..." he says softly. "I shouldn't have

said that... If you care for him.. There must be a reason. But

Genrou, you'll end up sad and miserable, you cry yourself to sleep,

each night... I worry about ya!..."

      "Chichiri isn't the only reason why I cry..." I answer. "I cry

because of Nuriko and Chiriko... how they died... How Chichiri could

die tomorrow..."

      "You could die, too... tomorrow, Gen-chan..." His voice is a

soft whisper. He comes into the bed with me, I'm aware how naked I


      "Kouji, I..." He silences me with a passionate kiss. That kiss

make memories resurface, memories of me and him, comforting each

other, the only way we knew. We were young, we had too much fire in

our veins and a single touch would set us up. I close my eyes, it

would be so easy to close my eyes and surrender, love him since he is

giving me love freely.

      I push him back, it would be easy, but it wouldn't be right.

My heart and soul would never forgive me.


      "No... No, Kouji... When we were younger... We didn't know

better, but... not now... It would be a betrayal..."

      "BETRAYAL???" He's mad... I can't blame him... "If he would

stop making you dangle like a used sock, I wouldn't have done what I

just did... You know that... He'll never love you Genrou... Like I


      "Hai... You say it yourself... did... I'm sorry, Kouji... Those

days are over and you know that... You're my friend..."

      "I know ya big lug..." He puffs, then has a weak smile. "I just

wanted to comfort you... You're right, it was a bad idea... Still


      "To the bitter end..."

      "Great... well... I better go... I made an ass out of myself

enough for one night... See ya in the morning." Kouji leaves me, he

couldn't fool me, I saw the concern in his eyes. He thinks I'm going

to hurt myself, if I keep on loving Chichiri. But how can my love for

Chichiri be so wrong, when it feels so strong in my soul?

      I reach for my pillow and hug it tightly. "Chichiri..." I

whisper to the pillow. "Ai shiteru... Come to me... please..."


Chichiri's room in Konan palace:


      I can't sleep no da...

      Once more I am on my bed in the lotus position, trying to find

an inner peace I can't achieve. I resume whispering my mantras, but

nothing works, ever since the night has started, I can't sleep no da.

      My concentration on my prayers slacks and I am transported in

a fantasy like world. I feel strong warm arms around me... Tasuki...

I feel his breath on my neck... his lips brushing the skin there.

      I slap myself mentally and restart my prayers, I can't think of

him that way no da... I can't deal with this now.

      My hands fall down of their own accord, they fall listless

before me. I see his face, smiling at me, then crying over the lost

of Nuriko and Chiriko, so much tears... He cares so deeply. I wish...

I wish, I would have gone to him then and comforted him.

      But... I did not... I'm a coward, no da.

      He needed me... And I cowardly held back. I was afraid no da.

Afraid to go to him, to hold him... Afraid I would have kissed him.

His pull on me is so strong, I must fight against it.

      But I was mostly afraid of what the others would say, no da...

      I'm the worst kind of coward that lives.

      I'm afraid to love.

      Afraid to lose him...

      By my inaction... I probably did loose him.

      My tears come down when I remember seeing Kouji appearing out

of nowhere, the joy in Tasuki's face, that weird little dance they

did. I was shocked, I stared at them, my expression might have been

one of surprise because of my mask. But inside... inside...

      I start praying again, no I can't let my jealous nature take

over again. I shall control myself.

      I hate Kouji, I hate him for coming here... For making Tasuki


      NO!!! I can't have thoughts like that... Thoughts like that,

those were the same thoughts I had for Hikou when he took Kouran away

from me. Am I to relive this? Am I condemned to face tragedy each

times. No...

      I pray again, hoping to chase away those thoughts away with

meditations and contemplation.

      Something hits me on the head.


      I blink.

      "Nu... Nu.. Nuriko?..."

      "Hai it's me..." Nuriko smiles at me then frowns. "What do you

think you're doing praying like that you think it's going to solve


      "N... Nuriko" I repeat. "But... You're dead..."

      "Now you think I'd let something like death stop me from

helping my friend?..." Nuriko tells me, I could see that his form was

somewhat transparent, a ghost...

      "Well DUH! Of course I'm a ghost!"

      "DAAAA! Don't read in my mind no da!!!"

      "Oups sorry... That were your thoughts?... Wow... Sounded just

like talking... And before you lie yes I know your feelings about

Tasuki... so no use denying them!"

      "Just how long have you eavesdropped on me na no da?" I ask

hotly a little mad at my deceased friend.

      He looks at me smirks then his expression becomes more serious.

"Long enough to know that you're making a huge mistake!"

      "Wha... What would you know?" I ask a little too fast.

      "Because... I died without telling Hotohori-sama how I truly

felt about him. I was afraid too... And now, now it's too late. He

shed tears for me... He did care a little for me... Maybe... Maybe if

I had been more bold..." Nuriko shakes his head. "Anyway, the point

is. If you love Tasuki and you know he loves you... What the HECK are

you doing mopping around for?... Life is short Chichiri, you should

stop living in the past and concentrate more on the present and

future!... Believe me, I know what I am talking about!"

      I look at him, blinking and a bit overwhelmed by all he told

me. Nuriko looks at me and waits for my answer.

      "I can't..." I start.

      "Can't or won't?... Chichiri, i didn't know you could be so


      "W... What?... I'm not cruel!"

      "Then how can you let poor Tasuki cry and feel miserable. He

respected your wishes, he proved his worthiness to keep his word.

He patiently... He still patiently waits for you to tell him you are


      "But... I don't know if I should no da..." I tell him. "After

all... we are friends, Kouji is here and after what happened to me in

the past..."

      "BULL!" Nuriko snaps at me. "Just because something bad

happened to you in the past, doesn't mean you can't find happiness!"

      "But... Kouji is here..."

      "Damn it Chichiri! Tasuki loves YOU! So what if Kouji is here?"

      I look away. "It would be easier for Tasuki to fall in love

with someone he knows..."

      Nuriko stares at me as if I just gave him a slap in his face.

"Hello?... Are you living on the same planet as me? You don't choose

who you fall in love with! It happens!... You're supposed to be older

and wiser than me... I know myself more than you know yourself!"

      I frown how can he say such a thing. "I know myself..."

      "Then why do you do this to yourself?... I know you have a scar

to heal, but must you make Tasuki suffer also?"

      I blink. "What do you mean?"

      "He suffers in silence, so you don't feel pressure to answer to

his love until you are ready. But each passing day Tasuki sink in a

sadness, if you don't do something soon..."

      "But..." I frown this doesn't make sense. "Tasuki is happy. I

see him everyday, he's so happy ever since Kouji came back..."

      "He does it for you, baka! So you don't feel obligated to him.

He doesn't want to force your hand... He wants you to come of your

own free will..." Nuriko tells me.


      "It's the TRUTH, Chichiri... You think I better things to do in

the afterlife than come here and lie to you?"

      "Iya... no da... Demo..."

      Nuriko let out a frustrated puff. "You still don't believe me?

Very well..." He grabs my sleeve.

      "Ano... Nuriko no da..."

      "Follow me!" He yanks me and before I can say a word I'm being

slammed in the wall of my room.


      "Oups!" whooped Nuriko. "I forgot that you can't walk into


      I try to stop the ringing in my head. "I WAS trying to tell

you... na no daaaaa..."

      Nuriko sighs and brings me to my bed. "Okay let's take that

from the top... Lie down and relax..." He looks at me. "Well come on,

relax already... Aren't you a monk?"

      I actually scowl at him. "You try and relax when you have a

ghost in your room that just slammed you into a wall..."

      style='mso-fareast-font-family:"MS Mincho"'>Nuriko sits next to me. "Fine!... I'm sorry I forgot you were

still alive..."

      "Sorry to disappoint you no da..." I grumble.

      I hear Nuriko chuckle, I look at him. "It's a wonder isn't it?

We aren't afraid to show our anger but Love... Real Love... You know

Miaka was more courageous than I could ever be..."

      "Nuriko no da... You battled Ashitare... You did so many things

no da..." I start.

      "Hai... But I was a coward when it came to bearing my heart...

My emotions to the only person I ever loved. I even deluded myself

that I could love Miaka..."

      I look up at him. "Nuriko no da..."

      "That's why you shouldn't do the same mistake, Chichiri..." He

grabs me by the shirt. "You have to tell Tasuki how you feel... If

either of you die... You will both regret it..."

      I turn on my side, I don't want Nuriko to see my tears. "Maybe

it's better that he never knows..." I choke on my tears. "How I feel

for him. If I die, he can go to Kouji..."

      "BAKA!" I wince at the accusation. "Don't you get it?... Tasuki

will be devastated even more if you die! That's it... I'm tired of

all this... I'm showing you..."

      What I experience now is so sudden I am shocked. I can see

myself on the bed, curled up, it seems I'm asleep. And yet I see

myself floating over my bed. Now that isn't something you see


      "Since you have to see... I'll show you how Tasuki is feeling

sad." Nuriko takes my arm and we both go through a wall. It's a weird

sensation really, I blush as we pass certain rooms and finally, we

are in his room.

      Tasuki is crying in his bed and I feel so... like a peeping tom

looking at him, while he doesn't know I'm here. I feel ashamed

really, as much for my spying as for the way he cries and calls my


      "Tasuki..." I let the whisper fall from my lips.

      "He can't hear you..." Nuriko tells me as the door opens. It's

Kouji. How rude! I think to enter someone's room like this without

knocking first. I see the man going straight for Tasuki's bed.

Without realizing it my face constrict and my hands form fists. I

hate him for being there. I curse myself for my inaction.

      Nuriko has remarked my reactions. "Why are you reacting this

way?... Didn't you say you would rather Tasuki loved Kouji?"

      I'm too angry to reply. But his remark is like a glass of ice

cold water in my face. Why should I be jealous? Wasn't that what I

wanted all along?

      They talk while I think I catch only part of the conversation.

Tasuki is afraid that I might die. I close my eye, oh Tasuki, I am so

worried about you myself. I reopen my eye and my blood freezes over.

      Nuriko lets out a gasp, I bet he's regretting getting me here.

I can't breathe, I hear my heart shatter in a thousand of small


      I can do nothing more than watch them.

      Kouji is kissing Tasuki.

      Tears sting my eyes.

      That's what you wanted... wasn't it?


      It's is only right...


      Kouji will give him all what you can't...

      NO! NO! NOOOOO!

      It's not like you lov...

      I DO, I LOVE HIM!!! SHUT UP!!!!

      My conscience takes a step back as I cry. I lost him.

      I hurt like I never did before in my life.

      I feel Nuriko's hands on my shoulders. Then he gasps.

"Chichiri, look..."

      I don't want to but something compels me to look.

      I see Tasuki, pushing back Kouji. I hear what he tells him. He

tells his friend he's sorry... that he can't... he won't betray...

      It hits me.

      He won't betray me...

      He won't betray his love for me!


      How could I have been so blind?

      I feel phantom tears in my eye. Tasuki... Tasuki... How can you

love me so much?... When all I give you is sadness...

      "He thinks you are worth it, Chichiri... You are... All you

need to do is open your heart."

      Nuriko... You were right, I do not know my own heart. I watch

as Kouji leaves.

      "It's not too late, Chichiri... You have to forgive yourself

for your past, he understands and he is willing to take a chance on

you... Are you ready to give yourself the same chance?"

      "Nuriko..." I look at him, he smiles, he doesn't judge me. He

did help me realize I do love Tasuki, with all my heart. That I ache

for his presence and that I shouldn't be afraid of the future nor of

my emotions.

      I smile to him but suddenly there's a great noise in the

direction of my chambers. I turn in the direction of the noise and I

feel myself flowing like quicksilver away from my friend. I hear him

cry out my name.

* * *

Miaka's world, her brother's bedroom. . .


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I open my eyes. . .did I just feel Miaka's presence beside

me. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">  style="mso-spacerun: yes">      Wait a second. . .this isn't *my* bed! Where am I? And then

it comes back to me. . .the battle, the flash of light, waking up in

her world. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Gods, I really did cross over into her world, didn't I? I'm

in the place where she was a child, where she grew up. . .How strange

it all looks!

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Miaka's not here. I can hear her voice somewhere else in this

dwelling. . .somewhere downstairs.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        When are we going to be able to go back to my world? I *have*

to go back there. I just can't leave the others to die! Keisuke and

Miaka promised me last night they'd find a way to get me there. . .

what if they're not able to?

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Having to stay here, with Miaka. . .forever. . .tempting,

very tempting. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        What *is* this strange world of hers, anyway? Last night, her

brother transported me here in a carriage that didn't need to be

drawn by horses! They have lamps that work without fire. . .all Miaka

has to do is push something on the wall and it's as bright as broad

daylight! Could it be this is an entire universe of sorcerers and

magicians? Well, that *would* explain how Miaka traveled from her

world to ours in the first place. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I get out of the bed and walk into the hall. The room next to

this is Miaka's, I can tell. I can feel her vibrations all around it,

smell her sweet scent. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I peer in. Little bed covered with rumpled pink linens. A

couple of chairs, a couple of tables, one of which has a funny device

atop it, a kind of green rounded box with a window on the front. Some

shelves covered with books written in a language I can't read.

And. . .hmm, what's this, she has an altar to the gods of her world!

She'd brought some religious artifacts to my world with her. . .some

pieces of stiff paper with pictures of the various gods on them,

which I guess are used in prayers, and a small figure of one god in

particular hanging on a chain from her bag. Her altar has a whole

bunch of little god figures.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        They have animal gods in her world, just like in mine. But

these gods are strange. . .like no animals I've ever seen! There's

one that looks like a frog with an onion on its back. . .and one that

looks like a little fox with multiple tails. . .and a *really*

strange one that's just a big pink blob with hands and feet and HUGE

eyes! Hmm, this one looks like a turtle, could it be that her world

has a version of Genbu? And here's one of the god that was on her

bag, the one she seems particularly devoted to, a yellow thing that's

kind of like a mouse and kind of like a cat and has a lightning-

shaped tail. What did she call it? Pee-kah-choo?

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        So much I have yet to learn about this world. . .gods, if

it's *this* different from mine, what a shock it must have been for

her to arrive in Konan! Just like it was such a shock for me to

arrive here.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        The smell of food drifts up to me from downstairs. . .that

must be where their cooking area is. Miaka's cooking. . .my stomach

clenches at the very thought. Ah, well, I've endured it before and I

can endure it again. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Before I go downstairs, though, I lie down on her bed. Mmm,

the scent of her. . .all around me. . .like I was holding her in my

arms. . .I embrace her pillow, dreaming of the day when we'll be

married, when we'll wake up every morning with our arms around each


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        But where will that marriage be? Will we be in this world,

or back in my world? Or. . .maybe it won't happen at all? No, no, I

don't want to think about that. I've lost so much already. . .my

family, my best friend. . .I won't lose her as well.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I get up and toss aside the pillow. Time to find out what it

is she's burning down there. . .

# # #


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Gods, he really *does* seem fascinated with those things. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        After we cleaned up from breakfast, Tamahome and I went back

upstairs. He went into my room and made a beeline for the shelf where

I have my Pokemon figures. He keeps picking them up gingerly and

carefully examining them, as if they were sacred objects.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Keisuke has promised me he's going to dress Tamahome like a

prince for our outing. Oooh, I can't wait. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Wait until we go to the mall," I tell Tamahome. "I'll take

you to the food court and we can get Frappucinos at Starbucks! You

haven't *lived* until you've had one of them! And then we'll go

bowling, and we may even have time to go to Crown Arcade. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Keisuke pokes his head in the door. "Um, Miaka, we may have

to wait awhile before going. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "What? Why? But I wanted to take Tamahome. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "We'll still have time to go other places. But I just got a

call from Toji. . .his car broke down near the campus and he needs me

to give him a lift back to his place."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Near the campus. . .that's a half-hour drive each way. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        We're going to be alone for an hour. . .a whole, lovely

hour. . .My eyes are wandering toward the bathroom, toward the

shower. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Sure," I say. "We can wait."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Great. . .I won't be *too* long, I promise."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Tamahome doesn't even notice him leave. He's still too

wrapped up in my Pokemon. He's turning a Vileplume over and over and

over in his hands. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I walk over to him and grab him from behind, wrapping my arms

around his waist. He gives a bit of a start and almost drops the

figure, then sets it down carefully.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "We're alone," I say. "Come with me. . .I want to show you

something special."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Special?"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Over here, in the bathroom. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I take his hand and lead him, my heart pounding. It's going

to happen, at long last! I'm going to have him style="mso-spacerun: yes">  in the shower! Gods,

I can feel it now. . .the water pounding down on us, his hot, wet

skin under my hands and mouth. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        When we reach the room, he looks around. . . "I don't see

anything here that wasn't there before."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I turn and put my arms around him, bringing my lips to his

for a kiss. "You'll see in a second. For now, take off your clothes."

# # #


style="mso-spacerun: yes"> 

style="mso-spacerun: yes">       Whaat? She's being so. . .forward! I mean, gods know I sure

don't mind her wanting to make love. . .but did she have to ask me

like *that*?

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I see her reach over to the back wall of the room, which

seems to be made of square, blue bricks. There's two things on the

wall that look like steel stars, with a curved pipe between them.

She turns one star, then the other. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        And suddenly. . .IT'S RAINING.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I can only gasp and stare at it. Sorcery. . .it *had* to be!

How else could it rain indoors? I walk over toward it, my mouth

hanging open. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Tamahome? You can't go in the shower wearing clothes!" She's

dropping her own clothing to the floor, as casual as can be. How

could she be. . .when something like THAT is going on. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Miaka. . .it's. . .it's. . .RAINING INDOORS! And. . .and

it's all staying in ONE SPOT!"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "It's okay. . .it's supposed to do that! Come on, undress!"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">  style="mso-spacerun: yes">      "No. . .no, I'm not going in that! It's. . .it's


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        She turns to me. . .naked and beautiful. . .and kisses me


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "It's all right, sweetheart. A shower is the most natural

thing in the world! See, it's just heated water going through the

pipes and coming out here. . .all the holes in the shower head are

what make it come out as a fine spray." She caresses my hair. "Don't

you trust me? It'll be fun, Tamahome, it'll be a great experience.

We can wash each other. . ." She brings her lips to mine again, and

her tongue pushes into my mouth, gently stroking and caressing mine.

I moan deep in my throat. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Okay, I'll give her shower thing a try, if she's going to

persuade me like that!

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I pull away from her and pull off this baggy top-and-bottom

set I got from her brother and drop them to the floor. "Let's do it!"

I say.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Yes, Tamahome!" She takes my hand, and leads me under the

spray. . .

# # #


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        This is the moment. . .this is it! The tube of shower gel is

in place, he's coming into the water with me. . .gods, how do I start

it? How does it start in my fantasy again?

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        He looks up at the water splashing down on him. "This is *so*

amazing! I can't believe the things you people can do here!" He

raises a hand and pushes it close to the shower head, then yelps

when the hot water burns him.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Where's the fire? How is this water heated?"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "We heat it with gas."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "GAS? You mean. . .you mean. . .the water is heated by


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I can't help but burst out laughing. Of course, that's the

only kind of gas he knows about! But at the same time, I'm starting

to fell impatient. . .won't he ever settle down and let me wash him?

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "It's natural gas, from the ground. It's made from

fossils. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        But he's not even paying attention to me! He's splashing in

the stream of water like a little kid! Oh, Gods. . .we haven't got

much time to do this! I can see my lovely fantasy slipping away from

me. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Determined to salvage the moment, I grab the tube of shower

gel, squeeze some on my hand and start to rub it along his back,

slowly, making sensual circles. . .

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        He stops his splashing. Finally. "Mmm. . .what's that nice


style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Shower gel. It's for washing. Here, hold out your hand. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        He does, and I squeeze some on it. Which I immediately

realize was a mistake. Now he's obsessively fascinated with the

shower gel!

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Ooh!" he says, swirling his fingers around in it. "Look at

this! It's. . .it's slippery and cool. . ." Good Gods, he thinks it's

*food*, he's licking it! "Yuk!"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        Now I'm losing my cool. "You don't EAT it. You WASH with it."

And I take his hand and guide it to my body, hoping he'll get the

message at long last.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        He doesn't. "Miaka. . .you waste stuff like this by *washing*

with it?"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "It's not a *waste!* It's what it's *for*!"

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        "Why are you so upset, Miaka? All I did was ask a few

questions about. . ."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        All he did? All he did was ruin my only chance to live my

ulimate fantasy!

style="mso-spacerun: yes">        I storm out of the shower and back into my room, and fling

myself across the bed, dimly aware I'm getting the sheets wet. And

then, I start to cry.

* * *



      Oh my god... What happened to Chichiri? I turn and he

disappeared so fast. Suddenly I hear a frightened cry.


      "CHICHIRI!..." I cry out, my yell is echoed by Tasuki who

stumbles out of bed and wraps a blanket around his waist, grabs his

sword since his tessen doesn't work and is out and running before I

can even blink.

      What should I do?...

      I'm a spirit... I can't do anything to help my friends!...

      I hear Tasuki yell a battle cry.

      Hotohori-sama!... I must tell him... He has to do something...

The palace has been breached.

      I fly to Hotohori's bedchambers, even Seiryuu couldn't stop me




      "CHICHIRI!" I run and I pray I'm not too late, I slam into

someone in the corridor. I couldn't care less, get out of my way! I

slam Chichiri's door down and stand there.

      I see one of Kouto's ninjas over Chichiri, I see my beloved

struggle with him, the dagger raises and falls. I see it stained with


      I see blood and I turn berserk. I start to yell like a madman

and rushes the three armored men in Chichiri's bedchambers. I slam

my sword on them, they are surprised and I take it to full advantage.

I slash and parry their blows with my only weapon.

      I am dimly aware of the cuts I get from them, I just want to

make them pay for hurting my Chichiri. I hear a mumble of prayers, my

heart feels elated, he's all right! I was in time to save him.

      "TASUKI NO DA... DUCK!"

      I don't even question him and I duck; just in time. I see

Chichiri's staff zip over my head and hit the two warriors straight

in the face. Whooo!... That's going to hurt come morning I see more

of those bastards trying to get in.


      Those Kouto men aren't too stupid they know better than to

stand in the way of a Suzaku Seishi when he's mad. I'm about to

leap at them when out of nowhere jumps Hotohori, his sword drawn. He

pursues the remaining men with his guards.

      I turn to Chichiri. "Are you all right?"

      "Hai, no da..." He pales. "Tasuki, no da!... You're bleeding!"

      I blink and look, yes I was wounded a little, I have a few

nicks and slashing damage. Chichiri fusses over me.

      Hotohori returns to the room. "I will order some servants to

find you another room for tonight, Chichiri..."

      "No... No, Hotohori-sama... It's all right, no da..."

      Hotohori shakes his head. "It's too dangerous for you to sleep


      "I know... no da... I'll... I'll... Just stay with Tasuki in

his room for tonight, no da... No need to rouse servants in the

middle of the night..." Chichiri says this quickly and he looks at

me, a very quick look. He wants me to tell the same to Hotohori.

      "H... Hai Hotohori... no problem... they won't try that again

tonight... Chichiri's safe with me!" I tell him proudly.

      But inside...

      My heart is beating so fast, I'm nervous. I don't want to say

one word too much, yet I am afraid not to say enough. Chichiri looks

at me, the mask lets me see part of his true emotions. He's as

nervous as me, he's blushing a little, that's when I realize he

stands very close to me. I want to hug him and hold him even closer

and take all his fears away.

      But we have an audience.

      Hotohori looks at us. "Are you two all right... Tasuki, maybe

you should see a healer for those wounds..."

      "I'm all right..."

      "I'll take care of his wounds, no da, Hotohori-sama..."

Chichiri holds my hand and leads me back to my room.

* * *

Miaka's bedroom


      All I can do is cry.

      My fantasy is ruined. Instead of a perfect, passionate

interlude, it was a disaster. There's no way it could have worked,

anyway. Not with him seeing the shower as some kind of exotic foreign


      But that's not the only thing that's bothering me.

      All this time, I've been pushing back one fact that I didn't

want to face. . . a fact that has just been driven home in a cruel,

cruel way by what just happened.

      The fact that we're from entirely different worlds, different

times, different places, different planes of reality. Us being

together is out-and-out unnatural.

      I think of Byakku no Miko, who loved one of her Seishi. . . and

was separated from him after she summoned her god. She was forced to

live in her world without him, marry a man she could never love as

she had loved him. . .

      No, no, I don't want that to happen to me! I couldn't live like

that! I could never give myself to a man who wasn't Tamahome! But

Mikos and Seishi aren't supposed to be together, can never be


      "Suzaku's supposed to be such a kind and gentle god!" I sob.

"Then how can he be so cruel?"

      I feel someone sit on the bed, feel a hand on my back.

      "Miaka?" Tamahome says softly.

      "Go away! I need to be alone!"

      style='mso-fareast-font-family:"MS Mincho"'>"Miaka, I'm sorry. I guess I did something wrong in there. Come

on, we can try it again."

      "No, it's not you. It's. . . it's. . ." The words won't come

out. The feelings are stuck inside me, swelling within me, making me

feel like I'm going to burst.

      "What, honey? You can tell me."

      I can't! I can't tell you! I don't want to hurt you, my love. . .

      But the words burst out of me anyway. "I wish I'd never come to

your world! I wish I'd never been Suzaku no Miko! Then I wouldn't be

hurting so much right now!"

      "Oh, honey. . ." I feel him draw me close and press his lips

against my temple. I should pull away. . . but instead, I snuggle

into his embrace. I need it right now.

      "Tamahome. . . I can't stand not knowing what's going on with

our friends right now! I can't stand the thought that everyone's in

so much danger! And. . . I can't stand the thought of losing you when

this is all over! It's going to be just like the other Miko. . .

you're going to go back to your world, and I'll be left here alone."

      He pulls me closer. "That's not going to happen. I won't let

it happen! I'll do anything it takes to stay with you. Even if I have

to give up my powers, give up everything I am, I won't leave you,

ever! You're everything to me."

      "But. . . but, Tamahome, you belong in Konan! You're going to

have to go back there, even if I can't!"

      "No I don't. Not anymore. There's no reason for me to be in

Konan. style="mso-spacerun: yes">  My family is gone. I've got no connections to anything. . .

except you. My home is wherever you are. I'll adjust. . . I'll become

a citizen of this world. Hell, I'll even start worshipping Pee-ka-chu

and that pink blobby thing."

      What? *Worshipping* Pikachu? Does he think my Pokemon are. . .

are. . .GODS?

      I try to hold in the giggles, but I just can't. They burst out

of me, uncontrollably. Pikachu, a god! I'm laughing out loud, and it

feels great!

      "Did. . . did I do something wrong again?"

      "Oh, Gods. . ." I manage to get my giggles under control and

throw my arms around him. "No. I'll explain about what those are

later. Right now, can we just enjoy being together?"

      I want to believe in what you said, my love. I want the

security of knowing that somehow, some way, we'll be together no

matter what. And I have faith that you'll try anything, do anything

to be with me.

      But for now. . .

      "Of course," he says in his sexy whisper, bringing his lips to

mine. I kiss back with a hunger, with a desperate passion, with a

desire to keep him here with me forever. My hands are starting to

wander up and down his body, along his back, his shoulders, then

grabbing and caressing his bottom.

# # style="mso-spacerun: yes">  #


      Ohh. . . yes, Miaka! That feels good, so good. . . I can feel

myself hardening already. I want so, so much to be able to lie on top

of her, to penetrate her, to make us truly one. . .

      But I told her a couple of nights ago, our last night in Konan,

that we would do that on our wedding night. It would give us

something to stay alive for. And I'm going to keep my word. After

all, we'll be going back to Konan soon, facing the same danger. . .

      I let my lips caress hers, moving my tongue in and out of her

mouth. When I move over to her ear and nibble on the lobe, she groans

loudly. "I love you." she whispers.

      "I love you, too. Let me show you how much."

      I run my tongue down her neck. . . I know she loves that, her

neck is a sensitive spot. . . and hear her give a little cry. I keep

licking downward, until I reach what I'm looking for.

      "So beautiful," I whisper. "Miaka. . . your breasts are

gorgeous." I start to kiss my way over the curve. "So soft. . . your

skin is like velvet. . ."

      My mouth contacts the pink around her nipple, and I kiss it

slowly, letting my tongue barely touch it. Mmm. . . I move to the

hard little bud, and flick my tongue across it. . . once, twice,

three times. . . then kiss it. She gasps. I take it in my lips and

begin to suckle, feeling her arch against me and tangle her fingers

in my hair.

      "Tamahome. . . yes. . . ohhh, soo good. . ."

      Nothing can compare to the sound of her voice purring in

passion like that. I want to hear her make more sounds. I want to

make her moan, I want to make her scream. I move my head over to her

other breast and let my fingers play with the first. She arches her

body toward me, parting her legs in a silent offer. It's an offer I

intend to take.

      But first. . . I want to love her completely for awhile longer.

      I ease my mouth away from her and roll her on her stomach.

"Tamahome?" she says.

      "Mmmm, look at this. Your bottom is adorable." I caress it,

letting my eyes feast on it as my hand traces the firm, yet soft

curves. So shapely, so well-proportioned. . style="mso-spacerun: yes">  . Perfect. Absolutely


      "That feels good." she sighs.

      I bend over and kiss it, nipping it a bit. My fingers continue

to trail over the other buttock. I hear her moan, so I move my lips

about, kissing here and there. She seems to like anything I do back

here. . . and Gods know I like it! I take both her buttocks in my

hands and squeeze, and she moans my name.

      "Please. . . please make me come, Tamahome, I'm getting so hot


      "Yes, my love." I roll her onto her back, and bring my lips to

hers again. I run my hand over her stomach, lower. . . I feel how

damp the curls covering her petals are, and know she's telling the

truth. . . she's on fire.

      I slip a finger in between and find her entrance, caressing the

lips, barely putting my finger inside. She lets out a small cry. I

move the finger around. . . ohh, how she feels inside! Pure softness,

a wet softness that's meant to pull a man in and hold him there.

      "Do you like that?" I whisper. "You feel so good. . ."

      "Ohh! Yes!"

      "I'm going to give you more, Miaka. I'm going to give it to you

until you can't stand it anymore. I want you to come harder than you

ever have before. I'll show you. . ."

      I let my thumb reach up. . . ahh, there's her pearl. I touch it

and caress it *very* gently as my finger continues to go in and out.

She moans, calls my name over and over. . .

      I want to give you more still. A pleasure you're not expecting.

And I find one of my other fingers reaching back, back behind her

womanhood. . .

# # #


      What is he doing? He's reaching back there. . . is he going to

put his finger in my. . .

      OHHH! He did!

      Gods! Ohh, it feels good! He's put it just inside, just enough

to wiggle his finger around. Just enough so I know he's there. . .

      And his other finger in my other entrance. . . and his thumb on

my jewel. . . sensation, pure sensation flooding me from all over

that area, washing through my entire body, blocking out conscous

thought. All I can do is toss about and moan . . . move back against

the finger in my bottom, move up against the finger in my womanhood,

the thumb on my pearl. . . hot, so hot, oh, I'm burning up. . . and

so much pleasure, oh, oh, I don't know if I can stand it. . .

overloaded. . . I'm going to explode, yes, yes, Tamahome, keep doing

that, oh, Gods, you're making love to me every way you can, aren't

you? Any second now, any second. . .

      "Faster," I moan. "Harder. Do it, please!"

      "Come for me, Miaka! Come for me. . . let me hear you

scream. . ."

      And it happens. Everything explodes in heat and blinding white

light, and I arch up off the bed and let out a yell at the top of my

lungs, clinging to him as if my life depended on it. More. . . yes,

another wave, OOohhh. . .and another, more delicious shudders,

Tamahome, Tamahome. . .

      And then, it stops, and my whole body is relaxed, so

relaxed. . . I flop back on the bed.

      He kisses me. "How was that?"

      "Incredible." And I mean it. "You always know just what to

do. . ."

      "I want to please you as much as I can."

      "I don't know what I can do to match that." And I don't. I

sometimes wonder if I can *ever* give him as much pleasure as he gives


      "You just have to be you."

style="mso-spacerun: yes">       "I'd like to do more than that!" I kiss him.

      "IÕll be right back, honey. . .I'm going to wash my hands."

      "You remember how the sink works, right?"

      "Yes, yes. . .I'll be fine!"

      When he's gone, I stretch lazily and roll over on my stomach.

I could take him in my mouth again, he always likes that. Or caress

him with my hands. . .I sigh. What I *really* want is to take him

fully inside my body. But he said he wants to do that *after we're

married*. . .and I'll go along with that.

      There *will* be a wedding. We *will* be married. I won't let

myself think otherwise.

      I hear his footsteps, and feel his hand on my bottom. "Hey

there, sexy!" He kisses the top of my head.

      "Hey yourself!"

      "Mmm.. . you're gorgeous, you know that? I think I'm going to

just look at you for awhile."

      "That's not going to help your *problem*," I say, reaching for

his erection. I let my fingers slide up and down its length.

      "Ahh," he moans. "Yes, I do have a problem, don't I? Well, I

*know* you can help me with it!"

      "Maybe I will," I say in my most teasing voice, reaching up to

find one of his nipples and gently squeeze it. He groans.

      "Maybe? What do I have to do to make sure it's *definitely*?"

      I get up on all fours, ready to tell him to stand in front of

me so I can pleasure him with my mouth. . .

      Then, I feel his hand on my bottom again. . .

      "Miaka. . . can we try something different?"

      I pause, confused. Different? Is he going to put it. . . *in*

my bottom? Like in my other fantasy?

      "What is it?"

      He kneels behind me, grasps my hips. . . suddenly, I'm filled

with a strange mix of emotions. Curiousity (what does it feel like?

Different than his finger?), excitement (one fantasy *is* going to

come true!), fear (what if it HURTS?) and a bit of confusion (he

said he wasn't going to go *inside me* until our wedding night. . .)

      But instead of thrusting in, he begins to rub his manhood back

and forth between the cheeks. . . not penetrating, just creating


      A bit *too much* friction. He's not rubbing it very fast, and

I can feel his skin pulling on mine.

      I ease myself away. "Hold on. . . I'm going to make this easier

for you." I run to the bathroom and get out the jar of Vaseline,

dipping my fingers in and reaching down to the area he was just

loving. . .

      I walk back to the bed and kiss him. "Try again."

      "Miaka, are you sure you want to do this? It's just an


      "Yes, I'm very sure." And I get on all fours again.

      He kisses my neck, my ear. . . then, he grasps my hips again.

      "Oohh!" he says as he starts to rub. "Much nicer. . . yes. . .

ohh, this feels so good. . ."

      It feels good to me, too! "Mmm," I say, moving my hips back

against him.

      "This feels so good, Miaka," he whispers. "Your bottom. . .so

soft. . .so sexy. . style="mso-spacerun: yes">  .mmm. . .

# # #


      Oh, this feels unbelivable. Why didn't we do this before? Just

pure, pure pleasure, like I've never felt. I move faster, thinking

I'll never, never get enough. . . I want to come so badly, but I want

this to go on forever, too. Miaka. . . I want to share this pleasure

with you. . . I reach under her body with both hands, and begin to

gently stroke her jewel with one, reaching for her right breast with

the other. She lets out a long sigh, moaning, "Good. . . mmm,

good. . ."

      "Oh, darling. . . feel what I'm feeling. . . you're so

delicious. . .I could make love to you for the rest of my life. . "

      She's thrusting her hips now, and that rubs her harder, faster

against me, and I know I'm not going to hold out much longer. It's

going to happen, yes, yes, now, darling, NOW. . .

      And I shout her name as I feel the eruption from the bottom of

my soul. I pull away from her just as the pleasure overwhelms me,

and I'm wracked by spasms of bliss. Somewhere, I hear her cry out as

well. . .

      We both collapse onto the bed, panting heavily. "I love you so

much," I whisper, kissing her again and again and again.

      "I love you, too."

      She shifts herself around so we're holding each other,

face-to-face. We just snuggle, feeling each other's heartbeats and

breathing return to normal. How nice to just have a quiet, sweet

moment together, after all the hell we went through before. . .

      I can feel a sticky fluid on her back. "Feels like I got you,"

I say.

      "There's some on my back, and on my bottom. It's nothing."

      "I have to get you cleaned up."

      Suddenly, she sits bolt upright. "Cleaned up. . . Tamahome, we

still have to get you into the shower before my brother comes home!

I'm supposed to have you all cleaned up by then. . . we're just going

to have a time for a *very* quick wash, no playing around!" And she

grabs my hand and pulls me back to the bathroom, and that indoor


      Okay, I'll take that funny fruity-smelling stuff and wash with

it (still think that if I brought some tubes of it back to Konan, I

could sell it and get a *fortune* for it!) And I'll stand under the

magic rainstorm and let it rinse me off. I'll do whatever it takes to

fit in in this world. . .so I can be with you, my darling.


Tasuki's bedroom in Konan.


      What am I doing here, no da?...

      I want to be with him and yet, I'm afraid. I'm so stupid, no

da. He is younger than me and I feel like a child before him.

      He takes me out of my thoughts when he tugs at my shirt.

      "Chichiri..." He tells me softly. "You were hit..."

      "It's nothing no da..."

      He looks at me, the candles that are lighted gives his hair a

fiery look, his skin a patina resembling bronze and his eyes look

like molten amber. "I'll be the judge of that..." I lift my arm with

a little difficulty because I got hit in the shoulder. He looks at

my wound and turns serious. "I'll clean it..." He gets up and I watch

him gather what he will need. I blush, at the fact we are both half

naked and the sight of his body makes my blood boil.

      I've seen him naked before, we were in a pond with Hotohori

once and his body, I had to look away... Or else I would have had a

reaction. He turns his back to me, he has muscled back, like I will

never have in my life. I want to touch his skin but I can't I'm stuck

into place with shyness.

      He turns back to me with a damp cloth, he carefully cleans the

area. "Mmm..." He says, his breath on my skin makes me shiver. "The

cut isn't deep, but we better tend to that..." He binds the wound.

      style='mso-fareast-font-family:"MS Mincho"'>I take another and proceed to do the same to him. I never stood

this close to him before, never in this state of undress. It excites

me... I bite my lower lip. My hands touch him, but I dare not caress

him as I have always fantasized.

      Yes... I have fantasizes... It's so weird for me to admit

having them. He's so much more beautiful than in those dreams. Beauty

and grace... If he were a God... I would worship the ground he would

stand on...

      He looks at me, his eyes are so calm and soft, he waits. Dear

Gods, he still waits for me to tell him how I feel...

      But... How do I tell him?

      I had known Kouran all my life... It was easy to tell her. But

gods above, what I feel for him is so much stronger. I want to offer

him everything, my heart, my soul... my body...

      I tremble, he takes my hands into his.

      "Thank you, Chichiri..." His voice is so soft.

      "For what na no da?..."

      "For taking care of my wounds... and taking care of me..." He

smiles, he looks me in the eye. I feel like I'm melting.

      "You took care of me also... no da..." My voice is but a

whisper, I can't rise my voice higher, the words get stuck in my

throat. I want to say I love you... but I can't...

      "Well... Good night..." He tells me getting up.

      "Good n.. night?... Tasuki no da?... Where are you going?" I

ask, no stay! my heart screams.

      "I'm staying here... I'll just sleep on the floor."

      I blink. "No... This is your bed... I'll sleep on the floor."

      He chuckles. "I can't let you do that, Chichiri... Your cut

isn't deep but I don't want it to get infected.

      "In... In that case..." I start slowly, then I say the rest so

fast, I wonder if he heard me. "The bed is big enough for both of


      He looks at me, he blushes ever so slightly, like a child. "I

can't do that Chichiri... It would be better if I slept on the


      I take off my mask, I must gather my courage and tell him how I

feel. "Why?..."

      Taking off my mask, he's stunned for a few seconds, his eyes

tell me without a word he finds me beautiful, even with my scar. He

swallows and licks his lips, my heart skips a beat. What do those

lips taste?

      "I'm afraid..." he tells me simply.

      "Afraid, no da?..." I'm a bit surprised by his answer. "Of me?"

      He chuckles. "No... Of myself... Chichiri... I would be afraid

to... not be able to... stop myself from holding you... kissing


      I draw in a breath. "M... Maybe... I want you to do that to

me..." My head swims, yet at the same time I feel like a weight has

been lifted from my soul.

      style='mso-fareast-font-family:"MS Mincho"'>"Are you saying?" He asks me, still doubting his hearing.

      "I... I am... ready..."

      There... I said it.

      I finally said it.

      I feel dizzy, yet I feel free, I was afraid... I have no longer

a reason to be. I look up to him.

      I gasp.

      He's crying...



      I can't hold back those tears, he looks at me afraid that he

has hurt me. I smile.

      "Chichiri... You have no idea how happy I am... I'm so happy!"

      "You are crying, no da..."

      "Of joy, Chichiri, I cry of joy. I had resigned myself never to

hear this from your lips... But I have... I just did... You have

given me so much joy..."

      "Tasuki..." He slyly moves towards me, my arms go around him.

Finally, I have him in my arms. I shiver of joy as I feel his warm

chest against mine. I nuzzle his hair, short, yet soft, the smell of

the incense he burns to meditate lingers in his hair. I love this


      He moves again, lifting his head towards me. He's blushing,

it's so cute. He looks so innocent. He's older than me, I feel he's

the one who should be teaching me how to love. But I am the one. He

looks up at me, his lips moving slightly, he wants to kiss me but

doesn't know how to ask, how to move to initiate it.

      I bend forward and our lips touch. His lips are so soft, like

petals of a delicate rose. The first touch is fleeting, I give him

small kisses, he starts to responds to them. He makes little purring

sounds as my lips take him more.

      I kiss him softly. I want it to be a cherished memory for him.

Our first kiss, with both of us sober and fully aware of what we are




      My eye closes on its own. We're kissing!

      I didn't know what to expect, but whatever it was, I'm sure it

pales with this. His hand goes behind my neck to cradle my head. The

kisses multiply and become less and less innocent as my shyness melts

against his passion.

      He captures my lips, oooh... I don't want him to ever stop. His

mouth becomes more hungry, wetting my own appetite. I answer in kind

to his kisses, boldly pressing myself more against him. My hands have

started to move on his broad back, registering the muscles there.

      He darts his tongue suddenly on my lips. It sends fire in my

stomach. Gently he opens my mouth and I taste him. His tongue seeks

my own, it shies away out of reflex, but with a gentle urging, we

meet. Soon my own tongue is slipping in his mouth, fueled with

passion and a eagerness to learn more of him.

      I never shared such passionate kisses with Kouran. I never

would have dared. But it feels good and right. I know Tasuki's taste

now, I wondered what his kisses would taste like. No more dreaming or

wondering now, I know. He wants to break the kisses with me, but I'm

addicted, I don't let him stop. He gives me then a kiss that blows

my mind away, I shiver as his mouth moves away. I feel myself float

down on the bed with him over me.

      He drapes himself over me, holding me close, keeping me warm. I

feel secure and loved, yes loved. I never doubted I could feel love.

Tasuki... His name has become the beginning of my soul as I feel it

expand. He isn't confining me... He's releasing me. My cheeks must be

flushed, burning with passion.

      I reach for his lips and we kiss again. I never thought I could

get used to kissing him so fast. Those kisses are like half-

remembered dreams, as I become more and more sure. My tongue darts in

his mouth, I blush at my own eagerness to do this. I never realized I

had such passion inside me.

      He pulls back as we catch our breaths. His hands go around my

neck and he takes off my necklace, then he unties my hair. He

smoothes my hair, looking at me sweetly, a slight smile on his lips.



      Oh Chichiri... I look at him, he trusts me completly. What

could I have done good in this life to merit such a wonderful man in

my bed?

      Maaaa... I slap myself mentally, don't go too fast you

hentai... You're going to scare him away!

      I pass my hands in his unbounded hair, it's soft like the first

feathers of chicks. He closes his eye as my fingers roam in his hair.

That smile, how much I wanted to see it.

      "Chichiri..." I start softly. He looks back up at me, his own

hands raise to play with my hair. I purr like a kitten as his fingers

brush my skull, it feel very sensual actually.

      "Chichiri..." I say again, I touch his beautiful face. My index

traces his features slowly and softly, his chin, his mouth, his nose.

I then trace his scar, he shivers, the skin is very soft and

obviously sensitive. He reaches with a hand and pulls mine away from

his scar. All right darling... I won't touch it tonight again.

      He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it gently, shyly, like

a child.

      "Chichiri... I... I love you..."

      I kiss his hand and see tears brimming in his eye. Not out of

sadness but of joy, I kiss the tears away and drink them. When I'm

done he looks back up to me, blushing, hesitant as what to do next.

      I smile.

      Not tonight.

      I could show him all there is to be known of making love. I

could make him shiver and cry out my name. Make him mine, oh gods, I

feel myself responding to that. Make him loose it all in my mouth

like I did that first time.

      But I won't.

      He accepts me, accepts our love.

      He still needs time.

      I want us to be forever.

      Even though my body will hate me... I shall not touch him

intimately tonight. I might regret it. But it wouldn't feel right to

do so now, to make love so soon after he tells me he's ready.

      I rise from the bed. All I'm wearing is a tied blanket, I don't

know if I should take it off or not. He grabs my hand, afraid that

I'm going away.

      "I need to blow out the candles... It wouldn't be safe to sleep

with them still lighted..."

      He nods and I arrange the blankets over him. "I'll be right

back." I kiss him before rising to blow out the candles.

      Darkness falls in the room.

      Concealling myself in the night, I let the blanket drop. He

still has his pants on, I hope he doesn't mind, I can't sleep with

clothes on.

      I slip in between the covers, he gives me a place. Hesitantly

he snuggles against me. Yup he still has his pants on... He puts his

arms around my waist and gasps when he realizes I'm naked. He's a

little uncertain, I kiss his cheek.

      "Can't sleep otherwise... Gomen... But don't worry... I won't

do anything... Sleep..." I kiss his brow.

      He puts his head on my shoulder and I hug him close. There's a

comfort about our naked chest touching and I sigh with the sensations

I am flooded with.

      "Tasuki... no da..."

      "Mmmm?...." I look at him in the darkness, seeing only the

outline of his face.

      "Tasuki..." He bites his lips and whispers softly. "I love


      I feel so much joy, the words *I love you, Chichiri* get stuck

in my throat. My only response is to hold him fiercely, he hugs me

back just as strong, he understood. When I can work my throat again

I tell him.

      "Love you..." I kiss him again. "Sleep..."

      He nods and snuggles back into my embrace. I smile, my head is

resting on his head.

      "Hai... Tasuki... Koi..." He breathes sleepily. His breathing

slows as sleep claims him. My eyes close as my nose is buried in his

hair, the smell of incense lulls me to sleep.

      "Love..." I whisper before I fall asleep myself.

* * *

Miaka's bedroom


      I'm finished with my shower, and I'm getting dressed to go out.

We decided to each wash up 'solo' so we wouldn't be tempted to do

anything else. . . I can only imagine what Keisuke would think if he

were to come home and see us in a passionate heap!

      Tamahome assured me that he knew what to do with the shower gel

now, that he'd be okay in there on his own. I wouldn't be surprised,

though, if the tube went back to the Universe of the Four Gods with

him. . .and ended up sold on the street.

      That is, if we go back. . .

      Do I *want* to go back? It would be so heavenly if we could

just stay here together, with no wars, no Nakago, no constant

danger. . .

      No, we have to go back. If only just to make sure everyone's

okay. Besides. . . I want to see everyone again, I miss them. A lot.

      I find myself thinking about Tasuki and Chichiri. Will they

ever find the kind of happiness that Tamahome and I know? They love

each other. . . I know they do. . . but there's been so many

obstacles standing in the way of them being together.

      Yes, I want to go back. . .if only to see them happy together.

      I search around for the pair of bead bracelets my brother gave

me. I seem to remember having put them on before we went to the

battlefield. I can only find one. . .

      Oh, yeah, that's right! I couldn't find the other one! I

remember looking all over my room for it, and before I could find it,

Tamahome was calling me and telling me it was time to go.

      I put on the one bracelet. Maybe someone from the Universe of

the Four Gods will find its mate and I'll be able to talk to

them. . . it would be *so* nice to hear from them again. . .


The next morning in the corridors of the palace.



      "Tama... Come..." I bent and scoop my little cat. He goes

straight to his usual resting place, my shoulder.

      "Mitsukake!" I turn when I hear the familiar voice of the

Emperor and fellow Seishi, Hotohori.


      "Have you seen Tasuki or Chichiri?... I must talk to them..."

started the Emperor. "I want Tasuki to come with me and defense the

North pass, like he suggested. I'd like you and Chichiri to go in the

West and protect the people there..."

      "Hai, Hotohori-sama... I shall so as you ask. There might be

people there who need my skills..." I replied. "As for Tasuki and

Chichiri... No, I haven't seen them. I was about to go check in

Tasuki's room, maybe they overslept..."

      "Chichiri... Oversleeping?" the Emperor chuckles. "Highly


      "Both he and Tasuki have had troubles sleeping lately..." I

tell him. "They both asked me for some medicine... maybe last night

was the night where they finally fell asleep."

      Hotohori shrugs, sleep, food, clean water, those things have

become a luxury, these days. I know I mustn't loose heart, but the

more time passes, the more I feel something cold eyeing me in a

darkened corner.

      Soon, we are both at Tasuki's door. I knock.

      No answer.

      I knock again, still no answer.

      Me and Hotohori look at each other and nod. He pulls out his

sword as I open the door. We get in.

      We were expecting maybe that Kutou guard had come in.

      Maybe that there would be guards dead, Tasuki and Chichiri got


      But nothing could have prepared us for this.

      Tasuki and Chichiri all snuggled up in bed like lovers.

      The way they were holding on to each other that's what it

looked like.

      "Mreow..." Tama jumps from my shoulder and makes his way to the

bed as if this was natural.

      Well... I guess it is...

      I hear a gargled sound next to me. I turn to see Hotohori,

becoming pale...

      "W... Wh... What are they doing?..." He stutters. "Never

mind... I don't wish to know... I don't think I need to see them

right now." The Emperor looks flushed. "In fact... Ihearmyadvisor

callingme, gottagoja!"

      He's gone gone like the wind. I never thought I could see

someone move this fast in a full armor.

      Meanwhile in the room, Tama had made his way to the bed and had

jumped on it. He was seeking the warmest place and settled between

Tasuki and Chichiri, mewing.

      "...mmm... ama... go 'way..." grumbled Tasuki.




      Damn cat... I grumble as I wake.

      "Ssssshhh... You're going to wake Chichiri..." I shush. I open

my eyes and Tama licked my nose. I look at Tama, that cat doesn't

know how close he is to being pitched in a wall. When suddenly

Mistukake takes the little cat away.

      "G... Gomen..."

      I go wide eyed. "Mi... Mitsukake..." I look from him to

Chichiri and back to the healer again. "I... I can explain..."

      "Mmmmmm... Tasuki... no da..." purrs Chichiri, snuggling closer

to me, I can't help blushing.

      "No need..." says Mitsukake backing away with Tama. "Hotohori

wanted to see you about the upcoming battle... Maybe you need to rest

a little more..."

      "What's THAT supposed to mean?" I growl.

      "Nothing..." whooped Mitsukake as he ran away.

      I snuggle back to Chichiri, grumbling. Suddenly I heard a

chuckle, then I see Chichiri's shoulders shake.

      "Chichiri!... You were awake?"

      "Hahaha... Hai no da!..." He put his hands around my neck and

kisses me. "You're cute when you blush no da!..." He laughs at my


      I look at him with dangerous eyes. "Chichirrrrrrrri!" I start

to kiss and nibble his neck.



      I got out of my room a little while after, I have to watch

myself I almost went too far. I smirk, I wouldn't have minded. But, I

sigh, Hotohori wants to see me and Kouji and I better get there

before he sends Kouji in my room.

      But I'm so happy... I'm in love... I do a little pirouette in

the corridor. If Miaka could see me now!

      "Tamahome! Are you ready?.. My brother should be back any

moments now!"

      I blink. "Miaka?"

      Has she come back, but how? The Seiryuu no Miko send her back

to her world. Her voice came from her room. I push the door.



      She called my name but I don't see her.

      "MIAKA!" I cry again. She cries my name and as I look for her

I literally fall on a bead bracelet and I fall down.


      "Are you still swearing?" she asks. The bracelet...she must

have one that's identical! I can talk to her in her world.

      "Never mind that!... Miaka... Are you all right? Is Tamahome

with you?"

      "YES!!! He is... It's so great!..." She sobers up. "How are

things back in Konan?"

      "Things could be better... We're barely holding the siege... We

could use a good fighter like Tamahome here... But I'm glad he's

happy with you..."

      "How can you say that when things are so bad?" she asks me.

      "Because Miaka... In every desert... There's an oasis..."

      "Huh?... What are you talking about?"

      I grin. I have to tell her. "It happened Miaka... Chichiri told

me... He was ready..."

      "Huh?... Ready for what?" She asks, then it dawns on her.

"Oh... OOOOOH! REALLY?... You..."

      "Hai we confessed our love... I'm so happy Miaka!..."

      "Oh! OH! OH!!! I'm missing that!! OH TASUKI!!! I so glad for

both of you... Do the others know?"

      I laugh nervously. "Errr... Well Mitsukake kinda found us

together this morning..."

      "What already?... Did you treat Chichiri well?" she almost


      I facevault. "No... NONONONO... We just slept..."


      "No I mean it... I couldn't jump on him like that... I didn't

want to scare him away..."

* * *


      My heart is beating like thunder. It's what I've hoped for,

what I've prayed for! They're together at last! Oh, Gods, why did I

have to be separated from them while this was going on?

      They didn't make love, not yet. . . but in a way, that's a good

thing. Tasuki is willing to wait until Chichiri is ready, that's a

sign that he *truly* loves him. I almost want to laugh. For all his

brashness, Tasuki can sometimes be the perfect gentleman.

      "Chichiri is very lucky to have you, Tasuki!" I say.

      "I feel I'm the lucky one, Miaka."

      And then, I hear the door close downstairs. Keisuke is back.

We're going to be leaving in a few minutes, as soon as he helps

Tamahome get ready. Damn. . .

* * *


      "Oh... My brother came back... I have to go... Tell everyone

I'm okay... and..." She giggled. "Kiss Chichiri for me..."

      I laugh. "THAT... will be a pleasure."

      "I bet!" she grins. "Bye!"

      "Good bye, Miaka..." I look at the bracelet and wonder what

kind of magic permitted me to talk to her. I smile, I'm happy for her

and even thought things are bleak... I have Chichiri and with him,

I'm sure that we will be able to go through with it.

      I love him and I feel like I can take on the world!

The end.